Tumblr rescue: Top Five Headcanons Edition

[vanja]

Top five weecest headcannons (not super young like 14/18 or 15/19)

 

• The first time happens almost by accident. They’re sparring, then they’re wrestling, then they’re just grinding against each other, Sam rutting into Dean’s thigh and making tiny little noises in the back of his throat and before Dean can even form a coherent thought he’s creaming his pants like a teenager. Things are pretty awkward for a few weeks afterwards.
• Sam’s skin makes Dean’s mouth water. It makes him feel like such a pervert, but he loves the smoothness of it, all the places where Sam’s hair is still baby fine, all the leftover puppy fat that Sam hates. When he sucks vivid purple bruises into the inside of Sam’s thighs, they take days to fade. 
• Sam has no sense of self preservation and it’s driving Dean crazy. They’ll be in the back seat and Sam will just tuck his hand in Dean’s pants, and if John ever bothered to look in the review mirror they’d both be screwed. He can’t count the times he’s almost bit his tongue in half to stop himself from whimpering.  
• Dean is determined that he’s not fucking Sam until Sam turns 18. Or at least 17. It’s bad enough that he’s given his little brother tips on how to suck cock. The fact that they can’t go 24 hours without rubbing off on each other at the very least is screwy enough for him. But that doesn’t stop him from licking Sam open until his jaw is sore and Sam is practically crying into the pillows. 
• When John is gone for a few days they sleep in the same bed. Sam’s head tucked under Dean’s chin, his hair tickling Dean’s nose, long legs tangled with Dean’s. It’s soothing, Sam’s heartbeat against Dean’s side. It feels like home, no matter what filthy, seedy little motel they’re staying at. Dean’ll grumble about it, but he looks forward to those nights together more than anything. 

Top five avengers living together headcannons

 

• Thor snores. Loudly. Like you can hear him through three walls and two floors kind of loud. Bruce tried to get him to wear Breathe Right strips with no success. Steve’s stumbled into his bedroom in the middle of the night and rolled him onto his stomach. Clint’s started sleeping on the roof. Natasha’s threatened to stab him in the throat. Finally, Tony had to build him a soundproof bedroom so they can all get some sleep.
• Clint is a slob who leaves his dirty laundry all over the place. Like, he practically undresses across three rooms, and then occasionally picks up a sock or two. He leaves empty cups on every available shelf. When he makes a sandwich, you can follow the crumb or lettuce trail and figure out the exact path he took from the kitchen to wherever. 
• Steve takes a 6am run then cooks an enormous breakfast for everyone. They make fun of him for it because ‘breakfast is the most important meal of the day,’ but they all love it. He remembers exactly who doesn’t eat meat (Bruce), and who prefers waffles over pancakes (Natasha) and who likes their eggs sunny side up (Tony). They all take turns cleaning up afterwards except for Steve. He loves cooking but he hates cleaning the kitchen.
• Natasha sings Russian lullabies in the shower. She has a beautiful voice. Clint is the only one who’s heard her sing, and sometimes he’ll sneak in and sit on the floor to listen. He’s pretty sure she knows, but she never mentions it so neither does he. He’s also pretty sure that if he ever told anyone she would slice him open from navel to sternum. 
• Tony doesn’t sleep well. He has nightmares and flashbacks and sometimes he’s terrified of falling asleep because some irrational part of his brain is convinced that he won’t wake up again. When it’s really bad he’ll sneak into Steve’s room and wake him up. They’ll sit on the floor, backs against the bed, and talk about stupid things until Tony falls asleep with his head on Steve’s shoulder.

Can you please do more avenger living together head canons please???? They were awesome

 

• Movie night is an actual thing that’s supposed to happen every Thursday. Not Wednesday cause Tony is an immature little shit who keeps yelling out ‘hump day’ every three seconds, and not Friday because it’s date night, and some of them (like Clint) at least like to pretend that they date once in a while. So Thursday night they get together, argue over take-out, fight over the movie, eat too much, and watch some godawful flick no one wanted to see. Bruce usually leaves early, Tony talks the whole time, and Natasha inevitably falls asleep and drools all over Clint’s shirt.
• Steve has a bunch of old pictures of Bucky in his bedroom. Compliments of Tony, who greased quite a few historical society palms to get his hands on them. They’re all framed and neatly arranged on his dresser, except for the one of Bucky in his uniform before he was due to ship out. That one sits on his bedside table where it’s the last thing Steve sees before going to sleep and the first thing he sees when he wakes up. No one talks about them.
• Unless there is something going on somewhere that includes food, drink, or a life or death situation, Clint will sleep all day. The others have placed bets on how long he can sleep before getting up to take a piss. The record is seventeen hours and twenty-two minutes, a tie between Natasha and Bruce. They split the prize which was a cheesecake from Two Little Red Hens Bakery.
• They spend an entire afternoon trying to teach Thor how to dance. Steve excuses himself the moment dancing is mentioned, mumbling something about meeting Sam and running out like his ass is on fire. It takes six hours to get the basic waltz down and by then, Clint is pretty sure his big toe is broken and Tony is considering calling down his suit. To everyone’s surprise, Thor actually manages to spin Bruce around the room twice without trampling on him. Bruce says it’s a skill, but Tony’s pretty sure that Thor is just afraid the Hulk will kick his ass for stepping on him. 
• One night, they all get stumbling ridiculously drunk and decide that Thor would make a pretty girl. Natasha produces a red backless dress and heels and make up, and they spend hours dressing him up. Tony shaves his legs with an electric razor because he’s too drunk to use a real one. Bruce paints his toenails hot pink to match the lipstick. Steve braids his hair. The next morning there’s lipstick smeared all over the couch and a bunch of little blonde hairs everywhere. Miraculously, no one remembers exactly what happened but they all agree not to talk about it.

5 stanford!sam headcanons?
 

• He spends the first six months completely out of sorts. It’s not the living on campus which is almost normal after a lifetime of seedy hotels, or the class schedule which is almost easy after John’s training schedule. It’s the freedom of it. The ability to sleep when he wants to and not because he’s exhausted. The ability to spend hours at the library without a purpose other than personal pleasure. The ability to plan his days, or not plan them at all. Suddenly, there’s so much freedom that he doesn’t know what to do with it.
• He keeps up with his physical training because it’s so deeply ingrained that he doesn’t feel right starting the day without running three miles first. He keeps the weapons. And he keeps the cell phone he had when he left. He keeps it charged. For the first few months he checks it all the time and he’s close to dialing a familiar number at least once a day. But he never does and the phone never rings. Eventually the phone goes in a drawer, the battery dies, and he forgets all about it.
• He gets a job at PetSmart as the PetsHotel Night Pet Care Specialist. It basically means he stays up all night with a bunch of dogs and some kittens and an occasional ferret or a hamster. It’s fun. He feeds them and walks them and occasionally, they roll around on the floor until he’s exhausted. At one point he figures out how to get the giant tv screen to stay on Animal Planet instead of playing the PerSmart ads. Nestled on the floor in a sea of dog beds with a golden retriever and watching Puppy Bowl, he feels cautiously happy. 
• He has a one night stand. Only one. It’s some random party he gets invited to just because he’s in two classes with the girl and he’s pretty sure she has a crush on him. He tells himself it’s what normal people do; go out, have a few drinks, meet new people. The guy who catches his eye is wearing a leather jacket. His eyes are blue and his hair shockingly black. They fumble in the bathroom, half-drunk, and it’s not bad, it’s not good, it just sort of happens. Only much later, passed out in his own bed, he realizes it was the freckles that drew him, and and he feels sick. 
• Meeting Jess feels like going home. There’s something about her no-bullshit attitude, her determination, her sense of humor. He doesn’t realize how lonely he’s been until he’s not any more. And if her smirks look familiar or her freckles often fill him with unexplainable warmth, it’s not something he allows himself to think about.

Top 5 Winter Soldier headcanons? Like during the years he was an assasin? Or top five Bucky headcanons post Winter Soldier movie? Maybe both if you feel like it?
 

The Winter Soldier years:

 

• In 1961 his name is Sasha Antakov and he is not a ghost. He is a shadow. He is not the muscle or the assassin, he is the poison seeping from the darkness. An acid seeping through woodwork. He is a combination of dark eyes and violent grins, stories of injustices shared over cheap glasses of vodka in dingy little Minsk bars. He is a plague on human reason, a whisper that appeals to the worst in us all. He speaks, and a man named Lee Harvey Oswald listens. 
• In 1967 his name is Raoul Felder and he’s a shadow yet again. He follows another from Canada to Alabama, to Mexico, then finally L.A. No one sees him, no one remembers him. He can make himself small when he needs to. His French is immaculate. He has a deep Alabama drawl. HIs Spanish is flawless. He is from everywhere and he is from nowhere. In April 1968 he is in a rooming house in Memphis, sharing a room with Eric Starvo Galt. By July 1968 when James Earl Ray is arrested, he is long gone, just a whisper on the wind.
• In 1983 he has a team he doesn’t need. They don’t speak to him and he doesn’t speak to them. His handlers don’t understand that he doesn’t need back up, he doesn’t need a second set of eyes or a second set of hands. He has no conscience, no thoughts of his own; he has nothing but the mission. It’s comically easy, 269 bodies trapped in a steel box, alive one moment and dead in the next. His mission report is short and stark, and he erases it afterwards with remarkable ease. 
• In 1991 he is a ghost. It has to look like an accident. It’s his easiest assignment to date. Just a car malfunction, nothing more. He likes the flames and stays nearby even after the screaming has stopped. The heat of it dries his lips and makes his eyes burn. He doesn’t understand why he still feels cold.
• In 1998 he is a teacher, merciless and unforgiving. He has no sympathy for soft throats or delicate ankles. He speaks rarely and offers no encouragement. He is unyielding, terrifying, utterly devoid of all that makes him a man. He snaps fragile wrists and dislocates joints, cutting an already small group even smaller. Those who survive him are now ready to become him. Natalia Alianovna Romanoff is at the top of the list.

Top 5 endings for spn (I'm sorry)

 

• They get a call about a suspicious amount of demons gathering in one place so they decide to check it out. They’re not in a hurry. These days, a group of demons is nothing to get excited about. They even have a fun drive, it’s sort of like the old times. Dean’s singing too loud to AC/DC and Sam is pretending he’s grumpy, like he doesn’t love seeing Dean back in his element. When they get there it’s almost too easy. A dozen demons or so, enough to get them breathing hard, to make them wonder if they’re just a little bit out of shape. Dean has no inkling something is wrong. He never even thinks about the fact that they’re in Detroit until a hand wraps around his throat and Lucifer purrs, “Don’t you ever listen? I told you you’d always end up here.”
• Dean wakes up one morning in a white room, strapped to a spotless hospital bed. He tries to remember their last hunt but it all comes in bits and pieces. There had been a coven hadn’t it? He’d always hated witches. No matter how hard he tries to remember, he doesn’t know what happened with Sam. His head hurts and everything looks a little too bright, like a sum of bad hangovers combined with crawling out of hell. He struggles against restrains until a doctor walks in. The doctor explains that they’d restrained him because he’s tried to hurt the nurses and himself. That Dean’s been in a coma for two weeks. That Dean is lucky to be alive after getting  hit by an eighteen wheel truck. And that he’s sorry to say, but that Dean’s brother and dad didn’t survive the accident.
• With the darkness comes the cold. It’s ok for a while. The Impala is stocked with emergency provisions and there are blankets in the back. They huddle together and ration their food and water figuring eventually, the darkness would clear. Two days pass, then two more. The cold is constant, seeping into their bones. They’re starting to run out of water. Two weeks pass and they can’t tell day from night. Dean cracks jokes and Sam pretends they’re funny, pretends he’s not afraid. He sleeps a lot and Dean can’t make himself close his eyes. They make love twice, under pretense that they’re trying to keep warm. But there’s desperation in it because each time feels like it could be their last. Dean goes first, his head on Sam’s shoulder, and it feels like falling asleep. Sam is two minutes behind him. The next day the darkness clears and sun finds them entwined together in the back seat of the Impala.
• When Dean turns sixty, Sam puts his foot down. That life is done. Dean’s got a bad knee, a torn rotator cuff in his shoulder, and has gone completely deaf in his left ear. Sam’s no spring chicken either for being four years younger. He’s had to buy a special mattress or he can’t get out of bed in the morning. His glasses are now so thick that without them, he’s basically blind. They turn the bunker over to some new kid Garth recruited, and never look back. They buy a farmhouse. Dean spends a lot of time rocking on the front porch with his shotgun and drinking beer, keeping an eye out for anything suspicious. Sam becomes well known at the local library, finally getting a chance to read for pleasure instead of research. They eat breakfast at a small local diner every morning and the waitresses whisper how adorable they are, two old guys, married by the looks of their rings, growing old together. When Sam is diagnosed with chronic heart failure, they take one last road trip together. Sam wants to see the Grand Canyon and Dean is more than happy to hit the road again. He falls asleep behind the wheel two miles out of Albuquerque. When they fly off the road, it’s so fast, just a blink of an eye. The medics find them draped across each other and it looks like they’re smiling.
• It’s just a regular hunt gone wrong. Bound to happen eventually, even their luck doesn’t last forever. Sam is just a hair slower than he should be, he twists just a millimeter in the wrong direction, and instead of avoiding the knife, he finds it buried deep in his gut. And maybe Dean goes a little reckless, a little crazy. But he’s not long behind Sam in death, the same way they’d always been in life. They find themselves on the hood of the Impala again, looking at the stars. The cooler at their feet is full of beer, and no matter how many they drink, there is always plenty more. The sky is always clear and gorgeous, and the thruway behind them is always empty. They could get in the car and drive away, and they both know the road will never end, that each time they stop, there will be the same sky full of stars, the same cooler at their feet, and that they will always be together.

top 5 bottom!sam headcanons? :)
 

• Sam bought his first dildo when he was in Stanford. It was large and realistic and he told Jess that he just wanted to try something new. But every time he used it, he imagined it was Dean.
• The first time they used a strap-on, Sam cried out Dean’s name. Jess pretended she didn’t hear him say it. All those times he’d refused to talk about his family finally made sense. She never said anything because she was afraid it would push him away.
• The first time he bottomed for Dean it felt so good that he passed out afterwards. Dean freaked out until he figured out Sam was fine, then laughed for like half an hour. He walked around all puffed up for a week afterwards and insisted Sam calls him ‘the God of fuck.’
• Sam’s favorite position is riding Dean like his life depends on it. He likes it even better when Dean would let him tie his hands to the bedpost. That way Sam could take his time and prolong it until it bordered on torture.
• Dean can be pretty jealous so Sam’s never told him that his one filthy fantasy involves sucking someone off while Dean fucks him. Every time he imagines it, he pictures a random faceless stranger they’ve picked up in some bar, the faceless stranger and Dean taking turns. But he can’t see it ending well for the guy, so he keeps that fantasy to himself. 

omg top 5 gadreel headcnons please!

ok this is easy because I’ve basically written a fic including all of my Gadreel headcanons

 

• Gadreel loved Lucifer. Lucifer was charming and attentive and intelligent, he was the brightest star in the sky and the most beautiful of all the angels. He will say that Lucifer used tricks to convince him to open the gates of Eden, but the truth is, Gadreel would have done anything for him, all Lucifer had to do was ask.
• When he saw Sam Winchester dying in the hospital bed he knew that Sam was meant to be Lucifer’s vessel. He knew it because he could see the type of beauty in Sam that was only meant for God’s favorite son, and that Sam Winchester was the only human being in the world worthy of Lucifer.
• He fell in love with Sam. He fell in love with the way Sam sees the world, his memories, his intelligence, his heart. He fell in love with him just like he’d fallen in love with Lucifer, and he hated himself for it.
• When Metatron offered him salvation he jumped at the chance, now knowing himself to be weak and destined to commit the same sins over and over again, that no matter how many chances he is given to do things differently, he will hopelessly fall for the same temptations. 
• After he sacrificed himself, God took pity on him and let him be born again as a human, to live a human life. Gadreel lived a long life, met a man with sunflower eyes, got married and adopted three children. He died well into the old age, surrounded by loved ones.

top 5 sastiel headcanons?
 

• It took Cas a long time to figure out that he’d fallen in love with Sam because he’d never been in love before. He had no clue what it would feel like. He just knew that he felt dumber around Sam, that his stomach felt funny, that he ended up saying stupid things more often than not. For the longest time, he actually thought that it was demon blood, and later on the lack of Sam’s soul that made him feel out of sorts. It was only after remembering that he was the one who broke though Sam’s wall and the enormous guilt he felt, that he understood how important Sam actually was to him. But then of course, he took on Sam’s pain and it was too late to do anything about it.
• Sam didn’t fall in love. In the beginning, Sam didn’t even like Cas. But he wanted him. There was something about Cas’s mouth that was just fucking indecent. Something about that permanently ruffled hair that just begged for someone to grip it and force him to his knees. He was constantly torn between wanting to hear that deep rough voice begging him for mercy, and wanting to beg for mercy himself. That one sentence, “Will you, boy?” caused a week’s worth of wet dreams. 
• After Gadreel was forced out of Sam and Dean took off, Sam and Cas went back to the Bunker and Sam got borderline drunk. He felt hurt and betrayed by Dean, used by Gadreel, and guilty over Kevin’s death. Castiel was willing to do anything to convince him that he wasn’t alone, that he was loved. He wasn’t even 100% sure what sex entailed but when Sam kissed him, it never occurred to him to refuse. It was nothing like Sam had imagined it over the years. It was better.
• Then Dean died and his body disappeared. Sam started focusing all of his energy on finding out  what happened to his brother. None of Cas’s efforts to distract him worked; he slept poorly and operated on autopilot. Sex became rougher and infrequent. Cas couldn’t understand why the act remained basically the same but afterwards, he felt more alone than ever. They hunted together, Sam growing more reckless until he got seriously hurt, landing in a sling for weeks. He asked Cas to go. He said he couldn’t handle any distractions.
• With his hands full of demon!Dean and trying to find his grace before time runs out, Cas never asked Sam if things will go back to the way they were. A part of him is afraid to ask because he knows the answer. That Sam never actually loved him.

okay let me rephrase it- ignore the last message: Top 5 Wincest headcanons Post- apocalypse.

Post Lucifer?

 

• Dean had sex with Soulless!Sam. More than once. And every time it was rough and unsatisfying and it left him feeling like shit. He hoped that Sam just needed time to adjust and that his time in the Cage was to blame. Sometimes it felt like Sam was punishing him for being with Lisa. Feeling guilty, he never questioned it. This is why he was so angry when he found out that Sam had no soul. Not only because he’d essentially been having sex with a stranger in his brother’s body, but because he felt even more guilty for not being able to tell that it wasn’t really Sam.
• All those times Dean kept warning Sam not to scratch at the walls, it wasn’t just because he was afraid Sam couldn’t handle the memories of the Cage. He was afraid that Sam would remember everything that happened between them while he was soulless. All the times he mistreated Dean and Dean let him.
• After Dean ended up in Purgatory, Sam had a mental breakdown. Essentially everyone he knew and trusted was dead. He was completely alone in the world. On the night he ‘hit the dog with his car and met Amelia’, he’d already driven 300 miles without resting. He’d gone 3 days without eating. There is no dog. There is no Amelia. There is just Sam Winchester, passed out in the Impala on the side of the road, dreaming.
• Dean had sex with Benny in Purgatory. Benny pushed and pushed and Dean finally gave in. Benny didn’t care that Dean would call him ‘Sam,’ because Sam wasn’t there.
• To God and all the angels, it is understood that the things said between Sam and Dean in the church, with demon blood smeared over the floors and the King of Hell tied to the chair, were actual wedding vows. The only wedding vows appropriate for two soulmates who’d spent their entire lives bleeding for each other. And in the eyes of Heaven and Hell, Sam and Dean had been married since.

Top 5 bottom!Dean headcanon ?
 

• He only bottoms for Sam. Okay, so it’s not like Dean hasn’t had sex with other guys; he and Sam have definitely had their share of issues over the last decade or so, and Dean is only human. He likes sex, and he’s never been particularly picky about who he has it with. But bottoming for someone? It’s personal. Letting someone at his unprotected back or spreading his legs for them, it takes a certain amount of trust. Without the trust, the entire process is pretty fucking unpleasant. He knows; he’s tried it before. 
• The first time goes something like this: They’re in some moldy motel room just off the New Jersey turnpike, the thruway so close that all the windows shake every time an eighteen wheeler goes by. Dad’s passed out in the other bed, snoring so loudly he’s giving the eighteen wheelers a run for their money, and Dean is fucking horny. It’s just about three in the morning. Sam’s practically radiating heat behind him, and the last time they swapped hand jobs was fucking Tennessee. They hadn’t yet established whether dry humping when one of them is asleep is acceptable practice, but Dean’s seriously considering doing it anyway. Except when he goes to turn and face Sam, Sam is right behind him, and all he ends up doing is grinding his ass against Sam’s crotch and elbowing him in the side. Sam grunts and mumbles something that could be ‘what the fuck,’ his heavy exhale brushing the hairs on Dean’s neck. There’s a few moments of absolute silence where Dean can feel every inch of Sam’s cock pressing against him through two layers of flannel, then Sam thrusts his hips forward, his hand latching on to Dean’s hip bone, and they’re off. 
• They’ve done it like that before, although their positions were always reversed, Dean grinding against Sam’s ass until they both come in their shorts. But when Sam hooks his fingers on the waist of Dean’s boxers and pulls them down, Dean squirms out of them without a word. Sam’s cock is hot against his skin, pushing in between his thighs, and Dean doesn’t think about where this is going or what it means, he just knows he’s so fucking hard it hurts. He can’t work his own cock the way he wants to, not if they’re trying to be quiet, so he’s reduced to shifting and squirming until he can get Sam’s cock somewhere where it’ll get him off. Except the next thing he knows, Sam’s cock is pressing against his hole, pushing inside of him with nothing but pre-come to smooth the way, and it fucking hurts but it feels so good he feels like he’s gonna lose his damn mind. He cries out, forgetting they’re trying to be quiet, and Sam’s hand clamps tightly over his mouth. The snoring stops; they both freeze again, holding their breaths. The head of Sam’s cock is buried in Dean’s ass, painfully stretching him open, his fingers digging into Dean’s jaw. Dad shifts and grunts, as if he’s about to get up, and with startling clarity, Dean can see exactly what happens next. Dad sitting up, turning the light on, and seeing Dean impaled on his brother’s cock, puddle of pre-come underneath him, panting into Sam’s hand. He comes so hard he blacks out for a moment, mewling into Sam’s palm. From somewhere far away he can hear Sam swearing softly into his neck, can feel Sam’s cock twitching and spilling inside of him, but it’s all secondary to the aftershock thrumming through his body. He only knows that he wants to do that again. 
• After that Sam does research. He buys lube and condoms. He fucks Dean with his tongue and his fingers. They don’t talk about it because they’ve never talked about swapping hand jobs either, but Dean does plenty of talking when they’re going at it because Sam won’t have it any other way. If Dean wants Sam’s tongue in his ass, he has to ask for it; he has to beg for each finger individually, until he’s writing on all four and begging for cock. Sam never says no; not even when Dean wants it with nothing but spit for prep, hard and fast and painful, so he can’t sit down for days. All Dean has to do is ask. 
• His favorite position is sitting in Sam’s lap, back arched like a bow and hips grinding back slowly, his face hidden under Sam’s jaw. Sam knows to wrap one hand around Dean’s throat and slow his thrusts until they border on torture, until Dean is sobbing for release. It’s a vulnerable position; impaled to the hilt, knees splayed wide, Sam’s arm wrapped around his waist. Each time feels like that first time, Sam’s solid weight at his back, Sam’s hand trapping his head in place, feeling so full it verges on painful. He imagines someone walking in on them, seeing him spread open and begging, trapped in place and unable to move, and it pushes him over the edge each time.

Top five bucky barnes headcannons, before and after he was turned into the winter soilder.

Before Winter Soldier

 

• It’s an old story, thirteen year old Bucky rescuing Steve from some bullies and the two of them becoming best friends. But no one except Bucky knows that he’d been rescuing Steve long before they’d met. That he’d been watching Steve for months and beating up bullies behind his back. It just took him a long time to work up the courage to come out into the open. 
• Bucky was a poor kid growing up in Brooklyn in 30′s and 40′s, and he knew how to survive. He learned to live on next to nothing, to pick his battles, and to be invisible when the situation called for it. And he learned that as long as he had a different girl on his arm every night, he could occasionally swing his arm around Steve and squeeze Steve’s shoulder and ruffle his hair, and no harm would come to either of them.
• Even though Bucky grasped some concepts faster than Steve, he always did poorly in school. His teachers used words like inattentive, disruptive, or lazy. Bucky simply couldn’t make himself stay focused on one subject for long periods of time. It would be another 40 years before DSM-III acknowledged ADHD in children but by then, Bucky’s school days were long over.
• Bucky told Steve that he’d enlisted but he was actually drafted. He never had any intention of enlisting. He was afraid Steve would think less of him or that Steve would think he’s a coward, so he lied. Steve could never understand that Bucky didn’t give a damn about the war, and that if he enlisted, the only person he wanted to protect would be staying alone and vulnerable in Brooklyn where Bucky couldn’t keep him safe.
• When he was captured and tortured and experimented on, he promised himself that if he ever got to see Steve again he would tell him. He would tell him that he’s loved him for so long he doesn’t remember what it felt like not to. Except then Steve came for him and he wasn’t Steve that Bucky remembered and everything was wrong and different. By the time he figured out that Steve had stayed the same where it matters, and that Bucky was the one who’d changed, it was too late to say anything. 

Top five headcanon moments of Sam/Dean pining?
 

• Sam figured out he was in love with his older brother long before he knew he wanted Dean. Long before the sweaty dreams started, before he understood why his mouth dried when Dean walked around shirtless, before wrestling him became torture. He would study the sweep of Dean’s eyelashes while Dean slept and wonder if there was such a thing as loving so fiercely that it feels like dying.
• When Sam went to Stanford Dean kept one of Sam’s shirts in his duffle bag. Tucked way at the bottom where John would never find it by accident. Once in a while he’d pull it out and sleep with it under his cheek. The day he couldn’t smell Sam on the shirt any more was the day he went to Stanford to get him back. 
• When Dean was in hell Sam stopped eating and started drinking. He lost twenty pounds in a month. Every time he was faced with food he’d remember Dean stealing fries off his plate, or squirting ketchup at him, or talking with his mouth full. It got to the point here even smelling food made him nauseous.
• After Sam jumped in the pit Dean did what Sam asked him to. He got a job, played with Ben, slept with Lisa. At night he would get drunk and talk to Sam. If he managed to sleep, he dreamt of Sam. He told Ben the same stories he used to tell when Sam was a kid. And each time he had sex with Lisa, it felt like a betrayal. 
• When Dean ended up in Purgatory, Sam lost his mind. He constructed an impossible fantasy where he hit a dog and met a woman named Amelia who was in essence a reflection of him. She was as alone and lost as he was. He imagined offering comfort to this imaginary person because he didn’t know how to comfort himself. He didn’t know how to live alone, without Dean. To this day he believes that she was real.

Comments

[merelydovely]

Hey, any chance you could put super long posts behind a cut? This took up like three feet on my reading page ^^;

[vanja]

I thought I did 😂😂😂 sorry about that, should be fixed now

[merelydovely]

Thanks, looks good :)